Play date scheduled...

Play date scheduled.....

We have our play date scheduled for this Friday. The children's driver selected a location with food and a play area. He contacted us on Monday via email to schedule the visit. This will be my husband's first visit with the children. This will be an interesting visit because we will see the children and be able to interact with them outside of the offices. I am so curious about the visit because I want to see how the children are going to respond to my husband, particularly the little boy. The visit is scheduled at a public location and hopefully it will not be super crowded. We are scheduled to meet earlier to avoid huge crowds. However, I think that it will be a fun, quick visit. I will definitely post after our visit and share the outcome.

I am going to be transparent again for a minute here. My husband asked me this morning if the visit was even necessary now because it seems as though I have made up my own mind that "this can not be done" because I had my mind set on only one child. I told him that was not the case, however, I had legitimate concerns about taking two at a time due to different reasons.
He says my reasons were really not justifiable for saying no to the placement, if those were my only concerns regarding this particular case, if we are interested in moving forward after the visit. I just have normal fears as a "mothering" type of person and I know that he has a spirit of "anything is possible" and it can work because we are capable. Which is a good thing because he has prayed about it and put it all in God's hands. I think he just wants to make sure that I am giving them a fair chance and not writing them off due to my inner fears about taking on 2 children at one time when my mind has been made up for a while about receiving one child since we started the process.

I also asked the CW about their TPR's and that is coming up soon. They have been in care with the current foster family for a little over a year and there is only one possible family member that may try to go through the process of getting them, however, nothing has occurred with that yet.

We talked to a longtime foster parent that we are close to the day after Christmas when we visited with her and she said that it is normal to be a little scared, however, the things that I listed were not major i.e. (not having things for children their age and being prepared for them). She also echoed that those concerns of not having things already in place for children their age is minor. She actually saw a lot of positives with their ages due to one going to kindergarten in the fall, and the other a young toddler. She laughed and said, you all can still travel with the kids and keep moving and family plan as well. These are not two little babies that will lock you down. She agreed that their ages were perfect for doing so many things, if these are the children that we are supposed to have in our life.
She agreed that we should just continue to pray, seek God's guidance and wait and see how the visit goes to see if we should proceed. I advised the CW that we would definitely let them know if we are interested after a visit or two. I don't think it would take more than that if we wanted to proceed to weekend visits and transitioning them. However, at this point, I am neutral and guarding my heart to an extent with All situations. I am remaining open to all cases and waiting, praying and remaining patient.

I believe that my husband was reading my lack of excitement as I have my mind made up. I explained to him that I am being neutral just as he is and I am thinking of everything as relating to two children at once in regards to nurturing them and adjusting. I think that it has thrown him off a little because he probably expected me to be my normal bubbly self with excitement. He is always laid back and somewhat reserved. So, he is still in character! I guess I am out of character.

I know that taking one preschooler into our home earlier this year, by choice, helping a family friend out was not a big adjustment for us. It was pretty easy. We made adjustments and we made it work and our lifestyle continued on with a preschooler. However, we also knew that she would be with us for a year or two at most. Although, we were open to her remaining with us indefinitely if necessary due to her mother's circumstances.

A few friends in my inner circle that have adopted also noted that it is so easy to overindulge with one child and two children keep you balanced. I can see me falling victim to that with one child within our household to begin with. However, I just felt the need to take placement with one child to nurture them and allow them to adjust and then get another placement. They all seemed to agree that whether it is these children or not, they are spaced out such that it is great for having more children. They also agreed that my feelings are normal and I have typical fears and I am taking everything into consideration. I hope that I do not seem as though I am rambling out loud here, but I am speaking from the heart.

I will definitely post about our visit this week and whether or not we are going to proceed with future visits. It is an exciting time to have possible placements presented to us, however, I still have to remain neutral to an extent.

Christmas 2010...

Christmas day was a nice relaxing day once my husband and I finished cooking.
We finished cooking early in the afternoon and had dinner around 5:00 pm and to our surprise it began snowing hard in our area around 4:30 pm on Christmas Day, so we pretty much stayed in since the temperature was really dropping after we had dinner. This year we decided to finally use our formal china that we had not used from our wedding. Each time that we would spend a holiday in our home we would always say that we would use the formal china and we would always forget.
Well, this year we took the formal china out of our buffet cabinet and we actually used it. We also sat down and ate in our formal dining room as well. We have never had dinner in our formal dining room. We have entertained in our home and we have used the dining room as over flow with sweets and other things like that, however, we have never sat down in the room to actually eat! I am sure that I am not the only one in this situation.

We pretty much use our eat in kitchen which has a pretty large dining table and island to eat all of our meals and we never felt the urge to eat in the formal dining room. Well, this time we stuck to our promises and we brought out that china and used it. I am one of those southern girls who grew up with the notion that you had to have formal and casual china on the wedding registry. However, now many brides are not choosing that route. It really depends on how you were raised. It was/is customary for brides to register for all of that pretty formal china as apart of their gift registry. We were truly blessed to get our pieces from our formal china. I think that we received about 15 to 18 dinner plates, which was more than what I registered for. The fact that it also went on sale the weekend of the wedding helped too even though I chose a reasonable pattern!

I am proud to say that we brought out the crystal goblets, formal flatware, and formal dinner plates that had never been used from the buffet cabinet. We said that we are going to try to use the formal china at least 2 -3 times a year. It is beautiful and I definitely want to make use of it. I know that I am not the only bride that has been married for several years and had not used the formal china. I did not have the table dressed up for dinner. I pulled some the decorations that were in the room to the middle of the dining room table to make it work. I like things simple. It worked out perfectly. The little charlie brown type christmas tree that I have in my dining room gave away a nice glow as it turns from white to Tiffany blue.
We had one candle and that was sufficient or our dinner. We love sitting down in the late evenings with the lights on from the trees and garland. Our home seems so magical with the soft flittering lights. I love relaxing and just looking at the trees throughout the holiday and the lights.

We had one new addition in terms of trees to our decorations this year. I had not purchased another tree since 2006. We added a unique colored tree to our living room this year which is a neat antique black type color since that room has chocolate and neutrals. It was actually on sale a few weeks before Christmas which made it even better.

After dinner, we sat down and watched movies as the snow covered our area. It was really a nice surprise and sight to see on Christmas afternoon. It was a really good thing because we are so used to going, going, and going that it is just wonderful to be in your own home over the holidays to enjoy it. We had not spent Christmas in our own home since Christmas 2008 and it was time to spend a holiday at home without traveling. Although I really enjoy being with my family on the holidays and all of the large crowds, it also feels good to be in your own home once in a while.
I must say that I was getting a little home sick from not being around all of my family a few days before Christmas, but I was okay by the time Christmas eve came and I realized that we both needed the rest and we did not need to travel for this holiday. I had a few tears on Thursday and Friday and then I was okay by Friday evening. I have a very close knit family and it really means a lot to be home for the holidays.

Anyway, here are just a few quick pics that I took before dinner, after dinner and a few others. I hope that everyone had a wonderful Christmas Day filled with joy in His name. We are looking forward to 2011 and all of the new beginnings that we have in store!

Here is just a peek into our Christmas Day. I used my tiny cybershot camera to get a full picture of our main Christmas Tree in our family room so there is clearly a difference in picture quality in my opinion, but it is just to share. The smaller camera was easier to get a full length of the big tree versus my DSLR with the lens that I have.

Our meetings..

Meeting 1:

We had a meeting on Monday with the case worker for the children that we were called about. We had an opportunity to ask any questions and the original case worker also attended the meeting. They escorted us to a conference room on a hallway with tons of other secured conference rooms that were only opened by keypad by staff. We were given the opportunity to sit in the conference room and review the file alone and then later the caseworkers, supervisors and our SW from our home study showed up as well.

Basically, the paperwork that we read was pretty clear and contained all of the information and answers to any possible questions that we had prior to meeting. The paper work goes over the background of each child in reference to ethnicity, health, background information, family/relationships etc. It also covered how the children came into custody and other evaluations given to each child and outcome.

In terms of the children fitting our preference profile in regards to what we preferred or did not prefer was fine. It makes your heart heavy at times when I read and hear about the different situations that the children come from and it really grabs your heart when you hear so much. Many children now are taken into custody just due to their parents making poor decisions which is not in their best interest. It can truly go from one extreme to the next in terms of how children come into custody. However, we were pretty comfortable with what we read on paper. The case worker asked us after we completed reading the paperwork what we thought and my husband advised her that he would like to meet the children. It is one thing reading about them on paper and it is another thing actually meeting them.

It was a very nice meeting and we met everyone that we heard of via by name on paper and we had a lot of surprise visits popping by the conference room because I guess different people were notified that we were coming in to go over the file and they stopped by to meet us in person. It was pretty funny because we would turn and look at the door each time we would hear someone entering a code to open it and they would ask to confirm " Is this the ___ 's ?" and we would answer yes and the person would introduce themselves to us. I was able to give Christmas cards to the staff that we had been working with as well and they were very appreciative of the gesture.

I don't know why but I didn't expect the offices to be really crowded this week for our appointment, but it seems like everyone was there. We met around lunch time and we were there for a few hours in the conference room talking. At the end of our meeting, the case worker advised us that the children would be in the offices on the next day and she asked did we want to meet them. I was able to arrange to attend the meeting on Tuesday.


2nd Meeting: Meeting the kids

I had the opportunity to meet the children the next day at the offices after they visited with their biological mother. I arrived at the offices and sat at the case worker's desk. The children were finishing up their visit with their family and then they came to the case workers desk and met me. They were a delight to meet and we spent about 30 minutes together with their case worker, driver and my SW also came up to see the visit.
I brought the kids 2 small gifts and books/work books as little tokens and they were appreciative. I purchased a little baby doll for the toddler along with a Brown Bear book. The preschooler received a Toy Story 3 car and two workbooks.
The preschooler is extremely intelligent and is very aware of what is going on regarding meeting potential adoptive parents. The 2 year old was slow to warm, however, I guess I won her heart over because she came to me and also sat with me and was very personable. She looked at me often and made a lot of eye contact with me as if she was soaking it all in during our visit. Initially, I thought she was going to be standoffish, however, she really loved that cuddly attention that I give her and the 4 year old talked to me and played around me while I held baby girl. The staff was really surprised at how the little one interacted with me.

The workers were a little surprised that she warmed up to me so quick based on past experiences. Could it have been the snacks that I brought for their ride back to their foster home with their driver??!! I brought some snacks since I knew that I would be meeting with them in the late afternoon and I knew that they had a transport driver taking them back home. They loved the snacks and it was right on time. So, overall, the visit went very well and we are arranging a date that we can have a play date so that my husband can also meet the children.

I had to send the CW a list of available dates that we can meet the children with the transport driver to spend time with them until we decide on whether or not we would like to proceed with respite visits and or over night/weekend visits. I told her we would not really know how we wanted to proceed to until we spend some time with the children. She understands that we are not making any promises and we are being open and upfront. The CW also shared with us that she does have a few more cases that are coming up that will be adoptable children as well. So, we are being prayerful and keeping our options open.

After the children left with their transport driver to go back to their foster home about 45 minutes away, the CW called the driver about 30 minutes later because she wanted him to ask them how they felt about meeting me and if they wanted to meet me again. According to the driver, it had already been discussed, they "liked me" and wanted to see me again! The driver has been their personal driver on all visits since they came into care and knows the children well. The 2 year old actually told me that she wanted wanted to see me again after I asked her did she want to visit with me again when they were leaving. These are well spoken children who are in a loving foster home and they are aware of what is going on despite their young age.

These are wonderful children, however, we are not making quick decisions regarding any possible placement. We are being prayerful about everything. I know that these children will be placed eventually into a wonderful forever home once their TPR's are completed. Our goal is to spend time with them on at least 2 occasions to really get a feel of who they are and how they are outside of the office.

This will be a journey as we search our hearts and remain prayerful as we look at potential adoptable children. The most difficult thing is not allowing our minds to take over by saying we are not ready for this and for that reason and really listening for answers from God regarding the placements that we are presented, as this is a life time decision. Needless to say, our first meeting regarding potential placements was not as scary as I thought that it was going to be.

I will keep you all updated on upcoming play dates and other potential placements that we are presented with as things are on a roll now. You know, I have heard many people say that they knew it was the child/or children for them when they met them. I am not for sure if I am going to be that person that knows instantly. People say that you will really know when it is the right situation. Let me just say that we are truly relying on our spiritual gifts to get us through this so that we do not fall for answering to our flesh.

Which box...

are they supposed to check??

Which box should children who are biracial check? Especially when it comes to college admissions applications?
This is really serious when it comes down to applying to colleges, internships and for scholarships. I know this is a touchy issue for many, however, the reality is, what do you do?

I am sharing a real life experience from my immediate family that happened a short while ago.
I have 2 younger first cousins who are in high school and they are biracial (actually, there are 4 within my immediate family on that side). I have an uncle that I am same age as, (actually, I am 4 months older than him) who has 2 girls in high school and they kind of see me as their aunt versus their first cousin because I am their dad's age. That is another story for another day!

We have had the discussions since they were growing up as to accepting their identity and embracing both ethnicities. Their mother is caucasian and she and my uncle are separated after being married like 14 years, but they are very civil towards one another and my aunt is a wonderful mother to these girls and she still is in love with my uncle, the girl's father. They were married very young and we know how that goes sometimes. I explain all of this, so that readers will understand why we are so involved with the girls, but we have a close knit family support system.

Well, the oldest daughter is a Senior in high school. She actually finished her senior year this past summer, a year early by finishing back in the summer, however, we felt that she needed to attend this last year of high school, although her advanced placements classes had her finishing much earlier than we anticipated.
To make a long story short, my mother and I have really stayed on her in regards to getting her college applications in. She is exceptionally smart, and it is just a God given talent. It is no other explanation. In addition, they are natural athletes which is secondary to their scholastics in our family.

She sent some paperwork in back in the spring to one of the colleges of her choice and when she filled out the application under ethnicity, she checked OTHER, and left it at that. I think she did indicate that she might have written in biracial on one. Well, for the particular thing that she sent off, she never heard back from the school and several of her classmates did. I wonder why?? Hummm, could it be that you checked other? We know so.
She is one of the smartest students in her class and she did not understand why she did not receive any response and her classmates did receive responses and they were all from various ethnicity groups and not necessarily as involved academically, community wise or with sports. She is well rounded and she knows that she is well rounded and that is why she was puzzled. The funny thing is that this young lady is very intelligent, however, she doesn't realize how intelligent she is, which is a good thing in a way.

However, the big issue was that she should not have checked "other" box alone.
Let's face it, when large colleges/universities are looking at these applications, they need to know what ethnicities the students are for their own numbers. She is a minority and it is just a fact of life, everything boils down to numbers. Yes, you have to definitely earn a spot in a college and definitely compete for scholarships, however, it also helps when you are able to help them with the demographics. She learned from that mistake and my parents had a long talk with her after we found out what she did.

They visit my parents often for different events all during the year and this gives my parents an opportunity to expose them to even more in a large city, since the girls live in a rather small, rural town. We encouraged her to work on her college applications this summer and to get them out after my parents reviewed her essay. She did get them out and my mother actually went with them to an open house a month or so ago and it went well.
Last week she found out that she got into her first choice school, which is a very large school and wonderful university. Right now she would like to be a Dentist or focus on Sports medicine, which are both wonderful choices (we know that may change). I knew that she would get in to the school with her academics and activities alone which are remarkable. We are super proud of her.

However, the moral of this story is that she had to learn to remember to embrace her unique ethnicity, but also understand that she is considered African American. Her father is African American, her mother is caucasian, and she is considered African American. Until someone comes up with a universal "other box" that lists the different variations for biracial or multiracial children, we have to accept this fact. Not being upfront and having biracial and multiracial children be in an unknown group may truly hinder the opportunities for them in certain instances.
My husband is multiracial and we have this discussion all of the time. Most people have no idea of his ethnicity unless we share it or they see family pictures! However, he checks AA on documents, and he was not even born in the US, but moved to this country as a young elementary student. We both come from multi racial families and we discuss this often and laugh about it in certain instances.

The wonderful thing about these girls is that they do know who they are and are comfortable with it. They have a diverse group of friends of different ethnicities and they are very comfortable in their skin.
Now, I am going to say that this took years of building them up and making sure that they were clear of their identity. Many parents think that it is cute when their little one refers to their ethnicity as pink and tan, or chocolate and vanilla swirled when they are younger, however, the children really need to be taught what their ethnicity is so that they are truly comfortable in their skin and truly know who they are.

Their latest visit was after Thanksgiving and they came up with one of their girlfriends and attended an annual debutante ball with my mother and they loved it. They wore their formal prom gowns as guests and they saw the young AA girls be presented into society. I was once one of the young ladies presented as well, wearing a white wedding gown with long formal gloves (a long time ago). This is annual tradition where I am from and the chapter that my mother is in has been presenting these girls for 60 plus years, I believe. The girls really enjoyed it and they even have a desire to follow my mother's and myself in terms of being in a sorority and being active in the community.
It has been a journey with shaping and molding them, however, the end result is that we have well rounded girls and we are proud of how they have accepted both ethnic groups and embraced it. They will be able to handle themselves because they are comfortable in their own skin. I must say that a key component is keeping both ethnicities visible in their lives so that it is not just one sided. Children need to surely have some contact with others who have skin that looks like their own.

So, I guess, what box would you check, if you were in this situation or had a child that is biracial?
It is a sticky one, but information is powerful and when it comes to getting a top notch education, scholarships and more, you do what you need to do to get your name in the hat when it comes to getting an opportunity to be interviewed. I am still unsure as to what group other ethnicities place themselves in when the combination does not include AA. We already know that when one parent is AA, the child is definitely considered AA. It really goes back farther than that, if we look at history.

Sorry for the long post, however, I had to explain a little bit of the background and experiences to make this clearer. I hope to post some pictures soon of these sweet hearts. I have shown them in the past, however, as customary, I take down my slide shows after a few weeks of showing family pics.

phone call...

This afternoon I received a phone call from one of the agency's supervisors/administrators. I missed the call because I was out of my office for a minute and when I returned my BB was lit up with 2 missed calls. The first missed calls was from a close girl friend that I had not talked to in a few days and the second call was from a number that did not have a name attached to it in my phone's address book, so I called it back. Low and behold it was the phone of one of the caseworkers that the supervisor was calling from and while I was calling her, she was calling me back.

To make a long story short, they thought of us when this case just came up and remembered us since we started the process of beginning the home study. It is a very young sibling group with both genders. She advised us that she immediately thought of us when this case came up.
The children are in care with a family that is taking great care of them and they are heavily involved in activities, however, they will be more than likely be adoptable really soon and would like to have them in transition with a family.
The supervisor met us during the second week of our classes back in the fall and remembered us. She called me personally and asked if we were interesting in hearing more information by meeting with the SW. I asked pertinent questions up front regarding our profile and what we were willing to accept as well in our phone conversation today. She shared with me the information that she knew right off hand, however the actual CW would be able to talk with us more in depth.

Although our paperwork is not officially approved in the system, it is just a matter of them finishing uploading the final home study into the system, however, we have been cleared (background checks, drug tests, physicals, references, financials and all of the necessary stuff up front) and gone through every thing else required. She said that we could meet with the children's case worker to get more details and if we were interested in meeting them we could schedule a time to meet them if we were interested. She stated that if we were interested, our paperwork would be complete anyway in the next couple of weeks if we decided to move forward and do weekend visits to transition.

The concern of mine is more so that one of the kids is an older toddler/preschooler and I did not anticipate 2 toddlers or one toddler and one preschooler at one time. Our home study stated we were open to birth -2 years old, however, this is a little different since it is a sibling group. I don't think we actually anticipated 2 at one time either to be honest! Anyway, we are honored that these people took the time out to find our information and remembered us ( I don't think it was too hard ;-)) and thought about us with this particular case. It did make me feel good to know that we are thought about and considered when many people are waiting.

As with anything, we are open to meeting and discussing the case, however, we are praying on everything hard and we will see what unfolds when we meet and after we meet. We wanted to definitely meet with the SW because we just don't want to say no and we have not even reviewed the case or met the children, just because our mind was set on one thing. Although, the age of the older child was not in our preference, or was it? I can't remember.
Maybe we did stay open to 4 years old. It has been a while since we filled the paperwork out. However, right now they do not have many babies waiting for placement, however, we are not overly anxious and we know that cases come up sporadically, however children that are almost ready to be adopted are not in high numbers. We have waited this long, therefore, we can wait a little longer if necessary, to have the appropriate placement.

Again, I do not know how this will turn out, however, we are definitely people who are open to listening and reviewing the case. I know my mind says that this is way too much at one time when I think of it, but it is worth meeting with them and not just saying No. Ideally in my mind we would take placement with one child so that we could nurture the child and have our kids a year apart, however, we all know that is not how things work all of the time. She does have one more family to contact that may have a desire to adopt 2 little ones. We have to give her a call back on tomorrow to let her know if we are interested in meeting with the caseworker to proceed.

I will update here on what we decided to do as far as moving forward meeting with the CW and possibly meeting the little ones. This journey is turning out to be an interesting one to say the least!

A little more...

Here are a few more pics of our outdoor decor process with the Christmas decorations. I promise that I will do a little collage with a little bit of everything later from outside to inside. It was absolutely freezing here today. We still have a few more trees to wrap in lights. However, one of the large trees beside our home still has tons of leaves on it and we are kind of waiting for them to fall! Its kind of weird because the other trees are bare.
Other than that, we have 3 trees within our landscape bed to wrap between Monday and Tuesday. First, we will need to cut them back for the winter and then wrap them.
Here is a a couple of pictures of our front yard packages, tree, and wreath. There will be more to come.

quick update

On the adoption front, our SW contacted us last week apologizing on behalf of her supervisor advising us that he had been out of the office for most of the month of November and had not read her completed home study turned in and advised her to inform us that we could contact him directly if we needed to. I truly understand illnesses, mandatory workshops and furlough days.

They met this past week and he is aiming to complete everything and she will make any changes necessary that he finds. I told her that we understood and that it was not necessary for us to speak with him. He clearly knows who we are and knows that we are serious. However, we do understand that things happen. I am at peace with things because we are finished and now just waiting to be "uploaded" into their system and matched or have a child placed with us. She advised me that one of the home studies that was approved shortly before submitting ours was placed and another one is waiting. It all depends upon the preferences of the parents.

It is a little different dealing with the state because they are truly over worked with their case loads. Adding on adoption to the fostering program is a lot to manage for a state agency. We are not too concerned because everything has been completed and it is a matter of the supervisor checking over the information and finalizing it before it is uploaded into their system. We have been through a private home study before, so I guess this is nothing to new to us. I told our SW that we are fine as long as everything is taken care of this month and we are on the list. We know that she will be helping the department that considers placements with our case.

I am glad that we have a wonderful 'old school" type SW that contacts us on a regular basis and has our best interest at heart. Remaining in contact with families going through a process is an important role that the SW plays in representing the agency, whether it is a private agency or the state.

Overall, thus far, I can say that I am pleased with our process with them. I can also say that the faces of adoption, meaning the type of families who are utilizing the state system is changing. Our class was a prime example of the change. You are seeing more and more families giving the state an opportunity now through fostering and adoption. Which is a great thing, even though it requires a little more patience when dealing with them versus a private agency. I guess there are advantages and disadvantages on both sides, however, the end result is what counts.
So, hopefully, I will have some news regarding getting on the list very soon. Once we are placed on this list with our preferences (age, race and other pertinent information) it can happen very quickly or it may take a short while to wait. It all depends upon the cases coming through.
I will keep the blog updated as I receive updates.

Happy December...

I can hardly believe that we are almost in a new year. I wanted to start this month off on a better foot by at least posting something. The holidays are approaching and it seems like everyone is busy preparing. I can say that the last two months have been a bit overwhelming for us with caring for a sick dog, finishing up a process with a new agency, and much more!
Still, all in all, we are truly blessed and even when I try to think about complaining, I have to check myself quickly. I have so much to be thankful for as I look back over this past year. Not in any particular order, however, I just enjoy making sure that I am thankful for what I have been blessed with because it is super easy to get caught up in what we do not have.

I am thankful for......

-the birth of Jesus Christ and salvation for us
-my growing relationship with Christ
-a wonderful, supportive and patient husband, who is also God fearing
-my parents who are prayer warriors and are always there and speaking positive things into our lives
-family that loves me just as much as I love them and who are always checking on me/us
-family and close friends who are always praying for us
-my career, my husband's career and my business because there are so many people who lost their means of providing for their families this past year
-education and the continuing education opportunities that we all have here to expand our gifts and talents through furthering our education
-gifts and talents that we possess and are utilizing to the best of our ability in different areas
-home ownership (so many people lost their homes this past year and the year before due to the economic condition) It is easy to complain about what you have until you don't have it. I am thankful for my home and being a homeowner because many can not afford a home or even an apartment.
-good health
- being able to give my time, money and resources whenever I am able to
-learning to be more patient and lean not to my own understanding, but trust that everything is alright because God is in control
-truly being able to understand and learn how to walk by faith and not by sight with all aspects of my life, even when it seems like you are alone or it is just not happening fast enough!
-close friends who are life time friends that give unconditional love and support as well with all aspects of our life
-being able to still have a cheerful heart as a giver
-having choices and having wants and needs met

I am truly thankful for going through a process in which things do not happen in my time as I would want them to because I would not be able to trust God's timing if things happened when I wanted them to. His timing is the best timing and it allows me to be able to empathize with others as well when you have gone through something in which you have to wait.

Again, I have to remind myself when I am quick to complain or question God's timing with my own situations, no matter how big or small. It is so easy to look at what you do not have, or want, instead of focusing on what you are already blessed with. This is just my way of checking myself and being thankful today. I have always known that God has a plan for my life and I have grown to become patient so reap the "sweet" benefits of remaining obedient as I have done in other aspects of my life and the rewards were overflowing.

Everyone who knows me personally knows that I believe that there are truly seasons for everything. I am thankful for the seasons that we have experienced, are experiencing and the ones that are to come. I am constantly told and reminded that there is "no testimony without a test" and that is the truth. I am thankful for all of my tests in my life because they have shaped me into the person that I am and only making me stronger.

Back on the scene...

I hope that everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving Holiday!

We personally have so much to be thankful for and I will share a little more later this week. It is so easy to become frustrated and complain when there are always others that are going through so much more. I always try to keep that in mind when I think about complaining. Things are at a point now where I can blog a little more. We definitely have so much to be thankful for, period.

I will write a more detailed post on where we are with a few things going on with my disappearance from the blog scene. Until then, I will share a little picture of the decorations and preparations for one of my favorite holidays.

My husband actually put tree #1 and #2 up on the weekend before Thanksgiving. Our goal was to have the majority of the decorations up prior to Thanksgiving so that all we had to do was put the finishing touches on the larger items.

The trees still need to have decorations put on them, however, the hardest part is over. The largest one is fluffed, and it is about 12 feet tall and it is very time consuming when putting it up. However, I did not have to do a thing with any decorations this year. My hubby did everything alone and I am so thankful for him.

I arrived home on one Friday and the large tree was up. I returned in after being out on the following day for a few hours and he had the dining room tree up as well as all of the garland on the stairways, wreaths on all of the bedroom doors as well as down stairs wreaths in their locations. We also have a few mini trees in particular rooms for decor as well.

We have not placed the yard decorations out yet, and they will probably not go out until next weekend after the last bit of leaves finish falling in the front yard and we can blow them away again. However, our wreath is up on the front door. I will definitely post a few completed pictures once things are completed real soon.

The picture on top is a sneak peek snap of my dining room buffet and the bottom picture is my wreath on the front door. I love seeing how everyone has different styles with decorating for the holidays. I can hardly wait to see what all of my blogging buddies are putting up.

Happy November...and updates

Well, hello....

We have been busy as bees and I have had a good excuse for not posting.

On the adoption home front. Our home study is almost completed. There was one other study in front of us and ours is being completed this week. We are dealing with the state, so things are not extremely fast, but fast enough for us considering that they have tons of responsibilities. There were little requirements that were added right after we had our last visit as well. Nothing that would slow us up, however, it does take them a while to process everything being that they have several families.

One of the requirements that they added was having a picture of EVERY room in your home, pictures of your first aid kit, picture of your fire extinguisher, smoke detectors and carbon monoxide monitor. The new supervisors required the SW's to have the families to submit these. Taking a picture of all of those items was not an issue for me. I'm actually putting them into a template for her with each room labeled.

Our final home visit with the SW was towards the end of September and it went vey well. During the month of October I helped a foster parent out by going over to her home and seeing how she managed things and it helped take my mind off of my dog that was in the vet hospital. It was one of the foster parents that we connected with at our last class and she invited us over to her home. She is a great resource. We enjoyed spending time in the presence of someone who has been doing this for quite some time and has experienced a lot.

After October came it was like we were living in a whirlwind. My dog became sick the earlier part of October and he was literally in the vet's hospital for about 2 weeks until she referred him to one of the university's teaching vet hospitals not too far away when they were trying to confirm why his calcium levels were so high after several tests.

We found out last week that he has cancer (lymphoma) and has responded well to a the first round of chemo last week which took care of the hypercalcemia issue that he had as a result. We brought him home on Saturday with meds and fluids to help decrease renal failure from the increased calcium levels that he had experienced over the past couple of weeks. He is only 7 years old and treatment was recommended with hopes and prayers that his kidneys will return on their own with their normal functioning. So, we will see what transpires over the next few weeks.

It has been an emotional past three weeks dealing with all of this, however, we are dealing with it the best that we can. For those who have pets understand that they are like a member of your family and it is very difficult to have them sick and or to be given news related to their life span cut short due to an illness.

He is home and doing well and will be having another round of chemo this week. He is eating and really doing well, considering all that he has been through. Now that things are a little back to normal, I will keep my end of the deal that I promised and post a little more often. His illness really took us for a loop. We are just praying that his kidneys return to normal function since they seem to have the cancer under control, however, the renal failure could take his life if it is not returned to normal functioning. He is only fluids and meds to help with that and he seems to be responding to everything well.

So, while we are excited that things are coming to an end with the adoption process, we are also dealing with sick pet that has literally been almost like a child to us in our home and lives for 7 years. The wonderful thing is that our home is already ready for a baby/small child. We are not panicking about anything and are leaving everything in His hands with both situations.

We traveled a little in October as well. I was so busy with my dog's illness that I did not get an opportunity to post any pictures. I will try to post a few up within a week to share for a day or two. I am really gonna do better with posting. It just seems that one thing was happening after the other and blogging was the last thing on my mind to be honest.

Last class...

We had our last class/graduation tonight! It was so wonderful. We had a panel of guests including adoption and foster care placement and workers, foster parents, adoptive parents and babies/children present!

We also had another spread of food. The two caseworkers that taught our class also brought us a cake for our class graduation. My pictures do not give the table of food any justice. I was rushing trying to take the pictures as we were beginning the panel discussions and others were walking in. So, please excuse the unedited pictures. I just wanted to post a little something with this. I will try to post a little bit more this weekend when I have time.

It was so awesome so all of the little babies and children that were either in care or either had been adopted. These were the most well mannered babies and preschoolers that I have ever seen. They were absolutely adorable. I actually had the opportunity to hold one infant that was a twin and someone else held the other twin during some of the panel discussion and our break when we ate allowed the little ones to eat. These were healthy and just beautiful babies.

Our caseworkers reinforced the fact that we should create some sort of little life books for the children when they come into our home by taking pictures and keeping little things for them and journaling because it is important for the children to have some sort of record for themselves. I did that even for little Miss Sunshine when she lived with us and our caseworker loved how I had all of the pictures to documents the entire time she lived with us from beginning to end. I even kept work samples to scrap with the pictures as well.

The administrator that was over placement of cases spoke to our class and answered many of those questions that we all had regarding placements. We were able to ask all of those specific questions that we had as couples and individuals during this segments. It was important to find out about being available and having your phone and returning phone calls immediately when they are calling about a placement.

They also advised the prospective foster/adoptive parents that are wanting an infant to go ahead and have a crib. They will not allow a child to be placed in your home without a crib, car seat etc. A crib is a must. His recommendations was to go ahead and get the essentials because when it happens with little ones it is critical to be prepared if you want that particular infant. If you are not prepared, they will have to go on and call another parent on the list. It is that serious.

They also made it clear that many of the children that do come through private agencies come from the system and a lot of people don't know that. When they do not have parents to accept the children within the foster care system, they have to turn to private placement agencies to place them in foster care. I found this out earlier in the year this year an that was one of the main things that triggered us to give our system an opportunity.

We were able to talk to the foster parents who had fostered so many children and truly had a passion about this and this was their ministry.

We connected with one of the main foster parents and she gave us her card and we will be talking and visiting with her as well. She has been doing it for years and has fostered and adopted many children. It is truly her calling as well. After coming over to our table and talking with us during the break where we fed the little ones and talked she came over and talked to us. She also asked my husband about thinking about being a male mentor to one of the little ones in her house since she had mostly girls and he needs to have a male figure to look up to here and there. She said that it is hard to find male mentors for the little boys. Ironically, she also attends our church, but at a different location.

The little preschooler sat at the table and ate with us. My husband fixed his food and drink and he was a really great kid with wonderful social skills. She told me to email her so that we can get together and she invited me over since she is not far from us on our side of town.

She is a resourceful parent and handed out her cards to us if we needed anything. She is also one of the parents who helps with providing "start up" clothing, and baby gear to new parents getting placements to help them get started. She said she started that clothing ministry a while ago and receives lots of donations from friends and others who donate to this ministry.

As we closed out the class, we had a little graduation ceremony where our paperwork was given to us and we had to tell the class what we learned. We ALL admitted that we originally thought that the class was going to be boring, however, it was a treat and it seemed like we didn't have enough time each night. It was very interactive.

My husband initially spoke for us because he is the quiet one and I wanted him to speak for us first. He is quiet in nature, however, he truly spoke from the heart and got a few folks teary eyed. He shared that taking the class, meeting the adoptive/foster parents and children in the system dispelled the myths that he had in his mind regarding becoming a resource parent with an intent to adopt. He also said that it is definitely a journey that God placed us in and he has no doubt that we are in the right place after taking the classes over the past two weeks.

Not only have we gained a cool bunch of diverse and new friends, who will also be resources to us if we need it since we all will be either resource parents or adoptive parents, but we gained knowledge that will assist us with encouraging our other close friends to go this route as they have inquired about adoption as well with building their family.

I tried to get out of talking since he was talking on behalf of us both, however, they made me say something as well. I basically recapped what he said and stressed how significant the class was because it opened our hearts up to becoming a resource family when we initially stated that we were in it just for straight adoption. However, learning what we learned and seeing that it is an opportunity to bless a child and give a child a stable home if only for a short while will be touching a life, and that is what we are all here to do.

While adoption is our main objective, we know that we will have the right placement in our home at the right time when it is time for adoption. They are also aware that we are more so interested in adopting a child and will be keeping that in mind with placements. In many cases though, they are unaware of how long the child may need to be in care.

However, we are open to being an example for the bio parents when they are trying to get their children back in certain instances.

Now, we are Not a foster only family. We are "foster to adopt" which is now called resource families in our area. Being strictly an adoptive family limits your amount of calls for placement and being a resource family gives you more opportunity to have a child from a much younger age as you wait for the TPR if it takes place. Again, the typical length of time in care before TPR takes place is 13 months. Therefore, in most cases not all, if you strictly sign up for adoption, then it is more likely that you will get a toddler, however, there are those special circumstances that happen with infants. The child will have to be in your care for 6 months prior to finalization.

I will try to explain a little more over the weekend when I post. I am a little tired. We have really been burning the candle at both ends as we have been completing this classes.

Thank God we are finished! We will have a second and last home study visit this coming week and she will be coming by for a brief visit to test the smoke detectors and a few other things. I will keep updating. Once she turns in that completed report and it is approved by her supervisor, our documents are sent over to a different department which does the placements based upon our profiles that we filled out for what we are willing to take and the age groups. We were advised that it can happen very fast or it can be a month or so. We are prepared as much as we can be for either case.

Bargains..

On yesterday we decided to take advantage of the one of the sales that one of the major baby store's was having. You could bring in an older item such as a car seat, stroller etc to get 20% off of a new item/items. Which is a pretty good deal. We had not really purchased items for the nursery since we had been waiting. I think the whole newness of the excitement went away as we waited for a while and nothing happened. We decided that we had plenty to get started with and we did not purchase anymore items for the nursery.

We decided that we definitely should go ahead and purchase at least 1 pack and play for our home.We traded in an older car seat that a close friend gave us when we had little Miss. Sunshine. We had a car seat for her, however, the friend had 3 little ones close together and had a surplus of car seats. We took that particular car seat since it was older and used and gave it to BRU. We went around the store and decided on a pack and play versus purchasing another new car seat since we definitely do not know the exact age/weight of the child that we will be getting. We have an infant car seat and we have a convertible car seat as well. We have decided that we are going to wait on purchasing 2 new car seats of our choice until we actually get a placement. We prefer to have a pack and play on each level so that we do not have to drag them up and down the steps when we are in the rooms.

We decided on a pack and play/changing station for our family room for now. We will go back and find one that matches our bedroom once we get a placement. For now, the one pack and play will be sufficient. The 20% off helped out tremendously and brought the price down. I was able to get a really nice pack and play that matched our family room decor. Our family room is earth tone type colors, so this little pack and play fit in pretty good. For the sake of taking the picture, I took a picture of the pack and play in another room against a different colored wall.

We realized yesterday that we did not have to purchase many more items, even with an emergency placement. It is only a few things that I would desire to purchase which immediately after a placement and they are the following items: 1-2 more car seats, a floor bouncer, swing, pack and play for our bedroom, and high chair. We have the majority of the items needed to get started with a newborn. I am glad that we took the time while we were waiting before to purchase basic needs.

At this point, it is hard to prepare because we are not positive on the age of the baby since we changed agencies. We are fine with it because we are prepared enough. I can't imaging trying to rush to do things now in preparation or a possible placement of birth to 2. I truly understand purchases will have to be made, however, I do not want to be swamped with having to go out and get everything at once.

Here is a picture of the pack and play that we purchased to kind of blend in with our family room. I love the fact that these little things have small compartments to organize daily essentials for a baby.

Class #2

Things are really moving along. We had our second class and the class went by super fast. I took my beast of a camera with me to take pictures of the table with all of the food, however, I totally forgot to take the picture. We had more than enough food and we set the tone for our first pot luck type dinner/class. I brought in colored table cloths to give it a little flare, in addition to some serving dishes and platters to put the assorted sandwiches, cookies and chips that I brought in. Others brought in pizza, fruits, dips, and drinks. I actually think we had way too much food for our group size. However, everyone was able to take food home and a few other administrators came by our class and picked up some food as well.

A few of the topics focused on in this module was the whole child, special needs/services etc, sexuality issues, discipline, respite services, getting permission to travel out of state with the child, a few other things. We also had to draw out our schedule in a unique way which showed our current lifestyle from day to day and how having a new little one in the house will play into that schedule. It is interesting to see how busy our lives can get, however, you will learn to adjust to change in your home.

One of the SW's wanted the class to know that there is a sometimes a stigma with adopting from the state and she wanted us to know that they receive a lot of healthy babies and children and it is not all drug or sickly children as a lot of people assume. While I knew that, many others still have a picture in their mind of the type of children that are in the state's care. She gave an example of an email that she received earlier that day regarding a healthy toddler that was available for adoption.

The regional director and a few other administrators dropped into our class as well and introduced themselves. Many of them will be coming back next week to our last class serving on a panel to answer any of the questions that we may have. There happened to be a foster parent association meeting the same night next door to our meeting room. The group meets monthly and they are also resources to one another as well.

The 3 different types of parents:

One thing that the SW's and administrators wanted us to make a final decision on was what type of parent we wanted to be in regards to with the program. There are 3 different categories of parents with the program. The first is a Partnership parent which is a parent or families who desire to foster only. The second type of parent is a Resource parent which is a parent who will take a baby, toddler, or older child into their home for care and may be willing to adopt the child if reunification is not successful. The last parent is an Adoptive parent. The Adoptive parent is a parent/family who pretty much wants a child that is free for adoption or will be free for adoption as the TPR will be worked on.

One of the advantages of being a Resource parents is that it is more likely that you will get an infant if an infant is your desire as a Resource parent. However, that infant can remain in care for 12-13 months until TPR's are taken care of. So, there is a legal risk, however, if adoption is the desire, then the hopes are that your CW will try to place you with more favorable cases towards adoption. However, it is a risk.

We initially stated that we wanted to only be an Adoptive family and open to birth to 2 years old. However, since we have been in the class and have had the opportunity to ask plenty of questions. We may be open to being a Resource parent. There are legal risks with this one, however, we did ask if a family is a Resource family and their ultimate goal is adoption, does the adoption case worker consider the type of placement placed into the home. That is something that the workers consider. I believe that the key is for the families to be very forthcoming with their caseworkers to state what their expectations are and their ultimate goal in the program.

We are going to pray over making the decision to become a Resource Parent versus solely adoption over the next week while we are ending the class and finalizing our process. Once you make a decision to become one type of parent, you can change your mind, however, it can not be while you have a child in your home in care. It must be after that particular child. In other words, they do not want you going back and forth constantly while you have a child or children in your home in care. Which is understandable.

New changes:

Some of the changes that took place in my state with adoption are the following:

• If a child has been in care less than 24 months you will have to pay for the adoption finalization
• Past subsidy's may not be granted after the adoption due to the child not being in care for 24 months
• Once adopted, Medicaid may not be given unless the child has a documented condition and was receiving services while in foster care, hence no health insurance coverage for

Due to state budget issues, these new adoption changes are major because many families who were fostering before may not be able to afford to pay for the adoption of the children they are fostering. In the past, the state paid for everything and now there is set criteria. While this does not impact my household's adoption plans because we were going to have to pay for finalization with a private agency before and many other fees.

We were not expecting any sort of subsidy or adoption assistance anyway. We were expecting the child to have to be put on our private insurance and we were expecting to pay for everything else as with any other adoption. While this was not significant to us, it has been a heated topic for many foster families already in the system who may not be able to afford to keep a child due to not receiving assistance, health insurance or having to pay for the adoption finalization.

Each night I learn more and more and we are able to try to come closer to a decision of what we are leaning towards with the program. I am excited about having a panel at our classes next week. We will be able to get direct answers from the people who are actually in the field with the placements. I do believe that more and more people will be adopting from the state once the word gets out that it is a smooth process and they are able to meet the demands for adopting.

Class #1

We had our first class yesterday with our new agency. We will be finished next week!

It was a wonderful class and the time really went by fast. I wondered before we attended whether or not the 3 hours would be long and drawn out. It was not! Time went by really fast and the introductions and sharing was wonderful. Even our SW commenting on liking the dynamics of the class and our personalities. They commented on how we will connect and some of us will need to stay connected so that we can use one another for respite services if we need to.

I was not for sure how large or small the group would be since we were told before that they did not offer the classes monthly because they did not have enough adoptive parents to hold it monthly. Which seemed a little odd to me consider this a major metropolitan city.

However, we have 9 different families in our group and its a pretty large group. Our common denominator for the group was God and we all were very much active and involved with our churches, our faith, and the majority of us have dogs that we adore!

How did this come up? They had us to do an activity where we had to draw our family maps and draw out what was important to us and things we were willing to give up and not, kind of. It basically spelled out who was in our family, who we spent our time with and where we spent our time and the things things that were important to us such as our hobbies. I will take a picture of ours and post it when we get it back. We weren't artistic or anything with this activity because we had a minimal amount of time to draw it with the markers.

However, we had to go up and present our maps to the group and thats how we found out who one another were, shared common interests and personal information that we wanted to share on the map.

The majority of our group are all working professionals in different areas of professions and I would say the age ranges were closer as well with a one or two a little older. Great mix of professionals from divinity, medical, education, corporate, music industry/entertainment and much more. Higher education and volunteering was also a common denominator for this group and way of life from how it come up during the presentations. Everyone was down to earth and very jovial.

It was a very neat activity and we do have a very interesting group that hopefully I will be able to share a little bit later when we are finished.

All of us were interested in adoption and we pretty much all had similar concerns with adoption and risks for the placements in our homes if we chose to go that route instead of just adoption parents, for the ones who were not adopting family members. We also did a role playing activity as well which was hilarious!

The group immediately clicked and we definitely do not have a dry group at all! We voted on completing the class on next week versus making that Saturday our last day. My SW and another SW held the class and their supervisor also stayed for about 2 hours.

They asked the class to figure out how to bring dinner/snacks for one another so that we could eat since many were coming straight from work and it makes for a long evening with no food. We passed around a sign up sheet and it was done within minutes.

I volunteered to go ahead and bring a party platter from Subway with sandwiches since I am home/off this week and it is easy for me to order a tray and bring in a few items to set the table up. We will alternate next week with bringing in different dishes/drinks/foods etc. I wanted to get the big item out of the way first since I am not really busy this week. Someone else will be bringing in the larger food items next week and we will probably bring in a dessert one day and veggie/fruit tray another day.

I will try to take pictures of our food table when we have our second class on tomorrow. I forgot to take my camera yesterday to journal our class.

After my husband and I presented and sat down, the other SW came over to us during the break and we started talking. Long story short, she grew up in NYC near my husband and they know a lot of the same people and she went to college with my older brother in law. She remembered my brother in law, but he did not remember her after my husband texted him and gave the name. He may need to see a picture. He was an athlete as well, so go figure.

Long story short, her ex husband and my husband grew up in the same neighborhood, played sports together and went to one college together. She said she thought that she recognized his face but couldn't put it together. So, she sent a message to her ex husband to let him know that she met one of his old friends. She has only been living in our city for a year. Small world!

I am looking forward to our next class and being with our newly prospective adoptive friends and going through the next module!

I will update later...

Visit 1

Our entrance today.....

We had visit #1 today with our SW. She was in our home a little over 4 hours gathering information and typing into her laptop. It was a nice and relaxing visit and nothing that worked my nerves. We were all relaxed very comfortable. It is funny how things seem like a repeat when you are going through the process again, but with a different agency. It was pretty painless. Our SW was older and seasoned and professional. She is working to have this report completed quickly.

She did not take a look throughout our home until the very end. She was very courteous and very observant without looking through our home upon her arrival. I pay attention to everything! I also think because she is older and has been doing this for a while that she did not want to immediately come in our home walking around before talking to us face to face and getting to know us, although, we had spoken on the phone once before. I can appreciate the fact that she wanted us to warm up to her and talk with her before she started strolling through our personal spaces. I did not mind at all because we had been through this before and we expected to have our personal spaces invaded during this important process.

She told me that basically she only needed to see the room that we have for a baby to ensure that we have a room set a side. From that point on, the home tour took place. We were already on the main level and then we went upstairs and then we went to the basement last. She loved the nursery and saw that we were more than prepared for a child or toddler. She said that on the 2nd visit, which will be our last visit, she will test the C02 detectors and smoke detectors. I pointed them all out, however, she will check the functionality of the detectors on the next visit. Her next visit will be after we complete the classes. She will actually be one of the instructors for the class which is awesome.

One of my next door neighbors came by to notarize one of the documents that she needed notarized. She told me when she arrived that it is a form that we will have to notarize with all 3 of us. I called my neighbor who is an attorney and she came over after she got out of court and notarized the documents for us. The SW had an opportunity to meet her briefly and see our relationship as well. She was a little tickled that she returned my call so quickly when I called her and then agreed to come by and notarize the document on short notice. I guess she realized at that point that we are all pretty close knit once she arrived.

We also had an opportunity to discuss the baby that we are interested in adopting. I waited until the end to advise her of how we came to where we are. She will be following up with the child's case worker to make sure that the case worker knows that there is a family interested in adopting the child. She stated that this was very important because the information needed to to be given to the right people so that things do not slip through and we miss the opportunity. We did discuss us being open to birth through 2 years old and she stated that sometimes it happens right away and sometimes it takes a short while, however, she also stated as we did

" What is for us, will be for us."

After she saw our home, from top to bottom, I took her out on the deck and we stood there for a minute so that she could see the back yard and greenery. She loved it and as she walked back inside our home, she stated that all we were missing were little ones inside our home and she commented on how well appointed our home was and that my husband and I had done a beautiful job. I did appreciate the compliment though!

While I was not looking for any feedback on our home's decor, it is good to hear from a SW that comes in your home to like it because they go in so many homes and you want them to feel like it is child friendly home and a nice home for raising children.

Our home reflects our taste and style totally. I think that most people are on edge when the SW's come to their home because they want to definitely have a home that is presentable, no matter the size of the home or cost. It needs to be functional and presentable to someone coming in looking at your way and standard of living, to an extent.

She even saw a picture of little Miss Sunshine and wanted to see more. I took her into the office and pulled up iphoto so that she could see some different pictures of little Miss Sunshine and I think she was amazed just with all of the pictures that we had from so many different events organized in the computer. My husband and I shared our experiences with her about the period that she lived with us earlier this year and she understood our involvement. She said that she could see how happy this child was while living with us as well. She saw pictures of her before we had her and while we had her.

I also wanted to note that they have an eye for everything when they come into your home. She paid attention to small details such as pictures of family members, god kids, greeting cards out etc. I noticed how she would see something and walk up on it and look at it and smile. Little things drew her attention. She also noted the fact that she liked how we are in a cul de sac and have the back yard space and side yard space. She also noted that we had safety gates available to use in the home as well. She saw them in the basement with all of the extra nursery items packed away and a gate that we had in the nursery tucked in a corner. We also had a gate on our deck to secure the steps.

Anyway, thats all I can think of right now. I am very, very tired because we stayed up kind of late last night just trying to make sure all was in order for the visit.

The two things that she did mention was that it was mandatory for the home to have a particular type of fire extinguisher and to have a first aid kit in a stationary location. Of course we had already discussed the electrical outlets, cabinet locks and smoke detectors. That was all evident. So, when she returns for the last visit, she will test the detectors and make sure that our first aid kit is in a central or stationary location. We have fire extinguishers, however, I need to confirm that they are ABC extinguishers as requested from the agency.

Our classes begin next week and I will post more then. We have four evening classes and one Saturday class. I am sure that I will have updates between now and while we are in the classes. We will be completed with classes before the end of this month. The process will be completed at that point. Everything else was done earlier this summer. The class is the last thing that you take before getting a placement.

Stay tuned....

Helpful items..

These really work....

We purchased these bags back in the winter and tucked them away in a closet somewhere and forgot about them. For several years, I watched the info commercials telling you how awesome the bags were about helping you reduce clutter in your closets. I finally broke down and purchased two packs of them at a local retail store last winter. We recently put them to use as we were cleaning out the guest bedroom closets and preparing for our next home study visit.

I must admit all of the things in all of the guest bedroom closets are mine. I am girly and I love clothing. Period. No excuses.

However, the closets are neat and organized. I decided to take back over the closet that little Miss Sunshine had when she lived with us after we packed up everything and I already had the other guest bedroom closet. I put my dress slacks, dress shirts/blouses and casual dresses in there to make easier on me. Each closet that I occupy has its own purpose!

I must admit I have a touch of OCD as my husband has always said for years as well as a few other close friends.

Yes, we do have a generous Master bedroom closet. I just like having my items spread out by season or type of clothing, for example, all of my pant suits and suits in one closet and summer/spring clothing in one closet. It makes it easier for me versus cluttering our master bedroom closet with everything.

Now, I did not do this when I lived in NYC. I had several closets in my brownstone, however, space was limited, although I had a very large place.

I had a main closet for summer and a closet for winter and I utilized another closet for all of my coats and jackets. I also utilized a few storage bins in my hallway closet for items that I was not using. I was very careful with my space and everything was organized. It was very different living there as I was used to having a lot of space prior to moving to NYC. After leaving there and returning to what was normal to me, some of my old habits returned. It is true when they say, the more space you have, the more that you use or waste.

We actually did major closet cleaning in early June. We spent an entire weekend cleaning out the closets and reorganizing them. Sometimes, you have to take that time because things can really get out of hand. Yes, we do donate as well. We have about 5 bags that need to be taken to the Goodwill or Salvation Army now with gently used or items never used.

Anyway, I had tons of sweaters, turtlenecks, and twin sets in one of the other guest bedroom walk in closets stacked up on the top shelves. Although they were folded neatly, it was not an appealing look in my eyes because it was so many sweaters. I should have taken a picture last weekend, but I wasn't thinking and it would have been a little shameful on my end to show all of those sweaters stacked up.

Well, we pulled out these bags and put them to the test. My husband neatly refolded the sweaters and put them in the Extra Large Space Bags and vacuumed the air out of the bag. It really worked! I was a little doubtful at first because I had a close friend that said hers did not work. Ours worked and we sealed away at least 100 sweaters. The shelf looks so much neater and it is literally empty now.

It would really benefit me to put my seasonal items in the storage bags as well, however, it would take time to hang them up when the season returns and I do not feel like doing that now. Maybe later, I prefer utilizing the closet space that we have instead of packing everything up and having to look for something off season when I need it and pull it out of the bag. I may break down and pack away a few things just to free up some dresser drawer space in my other guest rooms that I utilize. It just makes my life a little easier to be able to walk in and get what I want without hunting for something or going down to the basement looking for items stored away.

This particular room is designated to also be turned into a another nursery as well and I will gladly move my items that are hanging up when that time draws near. It will be an easy move because I can just take everything and move them to our bedroom closet since it is all organized. Now, I will not feel as bad when the SW opens up the guest closets. She will not see so much overflow on the shelves. My husband put the space bags under the bed and they fit under there nice and neat.

While we are on the subject of closets and organization. I also love these little scent packs. I have them hidden in different rooms and closets in my home to always have a fresh scent without tons of spraying. I keep them in the linen closets, bedroom closets and bedrooms to have a nice clean smell on a regular due to the other bedrooms being closed and not utilized a lot. I grew up with my mother using these as well and I love opening closets and smelling a nice crisp laundry smell or white linen.

I always purchase these and I get my money's worth!

They are usually on sell for 5 for a particular amount and I rack up on them in different scents. It does make a difference. I am a person that loves walking into my home and smelling a nice fruity or clean smell without overkill. I will use particular plug ins within our home, however, these packs are great and are not noticeable if you know how to place them.

One of the cashiers in the store told me that to get the most effective scent in large room is to place 3 of them (of the same scent) in different locations in the room. Sure enough it worked. I placed 3 and it is more effective. I like walking by a room and smelling a scent, but not quite knowing where it is coming from and these are very affordable. They last much longer than those stick up deodorizers or other types for closets. The cashier also told me that she puts a pack in the bother of her kitchen garbage can liner so that it always has a fresh scent under the bag. I thought that was a pretty clever idea. I never thought of putting one in our garbage can until she mentioned it.

One of my favorite scents is the Laundry Scent. It is so nice and fresh. I love all of the ones that I have, however, the Laundry one is a favorite for sure. Of course I put the Laundry in my laundry room. I also like that scent in our master closet. I love the smell of April Fresh detergent and softener. Please do not ask me why! It is just a nice clean scent that I like to smell.

If you are into having a clean smelling closet or room without overpowering with sprays, try these and you will love them. It is truly a secret of mine. I have a pet and everyone that comes over to our home always says you would never know we have a dog because it always smells so clean and they are looking for what we use or ask what do we spray.

Meaning that they have been to others and it is a distinct smell of animals living in the home. I am very particular about that and we make sure that our home has a nice clean and refreshing fragrance when you enter, versus the smell of different foods that have set in to your fabrics. I think many people do not realize that their home captures so many smells and needs to be aired out often and deodorized to some degree more often than they think.

Anyway, these are my two little helpful items that I wanted to share. I really should have taken pictures of the chaos in that particular closet before we put the sweaters into the bags. They are definitely worth investing in. I am going to get two more boxes to store a few more things away to free up some more drawer space. I purchase storage magazines often and when I purchased my most recent storage/organization magazine it gave a really neat yearly break down and suggestion of when to clean out and organize each closet/room in your home. I will have to share that one later in another post. It also gives all of the neat sites and stores to get those cutesy items to help organize your every item.

I am sure that I am not the only one out there that had a not so perfect closet and with overflow. However, the great thing is that I recognized it and took the steps to make better use of my space and not be wasteful.