Our meetings..

Meeting 1:

We had a meeting on Monday with the case worker for the children that we were called about. We had an opportunity to ask any questions and the original case worker also attended the meeting. They escorted us to a conference room on a hallway with tons of other secured conference rooms that were only opened by keypad by staff. We were given the opportunity to sit in the conference room and review the file alone and then later the caseworkers, supervisors and our SW from our home study showed up as well.

Basically, the paperwork that we read was pretty clear and contained all of the information and answers to any possible questions that we had prior to meeting. The paper work goes over the background of each child in reference to ethnicity, health, background information, family/relationships etc. It also covered how the children came into custody and other evaluations given to each child and outcome.

In terms of the children fitting our preference profile in regards to what we preferred or did not prefer was fine. It makes your heart heavy at times when I read and hear about the different situations that the children come from and it really grabs your heart when you hear so much. Many children now are taken into custody just due to their parents making poor decisions which is not in their best interest. It can truly go from one extreme to the next in terms of how children come into custody. However, we were pretty comfortable with what we read on paper. The case worker asked us after we completed reading the paperwork what we thought and my husband advised her that he would like to meet the children. It is one thing reading about them on paper and it is another thing actually meeting them.

It was a very nice meeting and we met everyone that we heard of via by name on paper and we had a lot of surprise visits popping by the conference room because I guess different people were notified that we were coming in to go over the file and they stopped by to meet us in person. It was pretty funny because we would turn and look at the door each time we would hear someone entering a code to open it and they would ask to confirm " Is this the ___ 's ?" and we would answer yes and the person would introduce themselves to us. I was able to give Christmas cards to the staff that we had been working with as well and they were very appreciative of the gesture.

I don't know why but I didn't expect the offices to be really crowded this week for our appointment, but it seems like everyone was there. We met around lunch time and we were there for a few hours in the conference room talking. At the end of our meeting, the case worker advised us that the children would be in the offices on the next day and she asked did we want to meet them. I was able to arrange to attend the meeting on Tuesday.


2nd Meeting: Meeting the kids

I had the opportunity to meet the children the next day at the offices after they visited with their biological mother. I arrived at the offices and sat at the case worker's desk. The children were finishing up their visit with their family and then they came to the case workers desk and met me. They were a delight to meet and we spent about 30 minutes together with their case worker, driver and my SW also came up to see the visit.
I brought the kids 2 small gifts and books/work books as little tokens and they were appreciative. I purchased a little baby doll for the toddler along with a Brown Bear book. The preschooler received a Toy Story 3 car and two workbooks.
The preschooler is extremely intelligent and is very aware of what is going on regarding meeting potential adoptive parents. The 2 year old was slow to warm, however, I guess I won her heart over because she came to me and also sat with me and was very personable. She looked at me often and made a lot of eye contact with me as if she was soaking it all in during our visit. Initially, I thought she was going to be standoffish, however, she really loved that cuddly attention that I give her and the 4 year old talked to me and played around me while I held baby girl. The staff was really surprised at how the little one interacted with me.

The workers were a little surprised that she warmed up to me so quick based on past experiences. Could it have been the snacks that I brought for their ride back to their foster home with their driver??!! I brought some snacks since I knew that I would be meeting with them in the late afternoon and I knew that they had a transport driver taking them back home. They loved the snacks and it was right on time. So, overall, the visit went very well and we are arranging a date that we can have a play date so that my husband can also meet the children.

I had to send the CW a list of available dates that we can meet the children with the transport driver to spend time with them until we decide on whether or not we would like to proceed with respite visits and or over night/weekend visits. I told her we would not really know how we wanted to proceed to until we spend some time with the children. She understands that we are not making any promises and we are being open and upfront. The CW also shared with us that she does have a few more cases that are coming up that will be adoptable children as well. So, we are being prayerful and keeping our options open.

After the children left with their transport driver to go back to their foster home about 45 minutes away, the CW called the driver about 30 minutes later because she wanted him to ask them how they felt about meeting me and if they wanted to meet me again. According to the driver, it had already been discussed, they "liked me" and wanted to see me again! The driver has been their personal driver on all visits since they came into care and knows the children well. The 2 year old actually told me that she wanted wanted to see me again after I asked her did she want to visit with me again when they were leaving. These are well spoken children who are in a loving foster home and they are aware of what is going on despite their young age.

These are wonderful children, however, we are not making quick decisions regarding any possible placement. We are being prayerful about everything. I know that these children will be placed eventually into a wonderful forever home once their TPR's are completed. Our goal is to spend time with them on at least 2 occasions to really get a feel of who they are and how they are outside of the office.

This will be a journey as we search our hearts and remain prayerful as we look at potential adoptable children. The most difficult thing is not allowing our minds to take over by saying we are not ready for this and for that reason and really listening for answers from God regarding the placements that we are presented, as this is a life time decision. Needless to say, our first meeting regarding potential placements was not as scary as I thought that it was going to be.

I will keep you all updated on upcoming play dates and other potential placements that we are presented with as things are on a roll now. You know, I have heard many people say that they knew it was the child/or children for them when they met them. I am not for sure if I am going to be that person that knows instantly. People say that you will really know when it is the right situation. Let me just say that we are truly relying on our spiritual gifts to get us through this so that we do not fall for answering to our flesh.